Continue II

My first order was on July 3, 2019. I discovered this website when I was surfing through a Google search for the semi-colon symbol. After my order arrived, I received emails to invite me in joining the ZOX community. I didn't think much of it at first until I received a text message asking if I wanted a hotline added on my contact list. After reading a few ZOX stories, I couldn't help but share mine. I am a Disabled Combat Veteran suffering from Clinical Depression and Chronic Anxiety. My PTSD was not combat related. It became prevalent when I became a victim of Spousal Domestic Violence from 2002 - 2009. After my military discharge in 2004 and final divorce in 2009, the VA offered to continue my therapy. After attending every class for Self-care and Mindfulness well-being, I understood that my PTSD was deeply rooted from being abused as a child. I was barely 16 when I first attempted suicide. I was struggling to fit in at home. Going to school or helping in the kitchen were my only safe haven. My story is not uncommon to those who suffer degradation of self-worth, isolation and negligence from parents, who believe you are nothing more than property to them. I was 19 when I emigrated to the United States from Brunei Darussalam. My mother assured us that good things will happen once we settled in the US. When we arrived, her father passed away. When there was no record of a will or inheritance for her to depend on, the abuse towards me continued. My second suicide attempt was not as dramatic as the first, but I had to change my life. I remembered the advice that I was given on April 1995. Hence, my enlistment in the Air Force. Unfortunately, the first marriage was a setback to a life of freedom from abuse. I heard wind of the Semicolon Project in 2013. The heart-warming stories of survivors reminded me of my own exodus and survival to continue my life and my story. Unfortunately, I am allergic to metals. Therefore, I could not ink my skin. I have purchased several rings; but they immediately broke after a few months. I still wear my ZOX Continue band to remind me that I have so much more to accomplish in my life. The person who persuaded me to continue my life (April 1995) was right. I would have missed all of the wonderful things that life has to offer me.